Ahs a bin soakin up that there rain and suckin it right up mah stem, ah have. Gits so a girl caint suck up no more rain without showin' off her pistils n stamens n such. Never thought ah'd see the day when ah would open up mah petals just as easy as yuh please, n let all n sundry see mah insides n such. Ah feels kinda funny bout that. Still, it seems all the uther gals 'round here are doin' it. Guess ah'm no better nor worse than the rest of'm....
What's that yer sayin? Yuh wants ta friend me on Facebook? What the hell's Facebook? That one o them naughty sites where gals lift their petals and wave their dad gum pollen around? No sirree, ah aint a goin' ta expose mahself ta that there cow poop. ah jest aint that kind a flower.
Mumble, mumble mumble....
Now take mah cousin Arleen. Arleen Fuschia. Now SHE would do anythin ta git herself some more attention. Flippin back her petals and stickin her parts way out. Shameless she is! Shameless!
Go on, ask HER ta go on that there Facebook naughty cow poop site. Oh Arleeeeeeen.....
What? Whaddya want Coral? Quit yellin at me - ah'm tryin ta get me a suntan. Jezebel? Who'r you callin a jezebel? Why you little nasturtium.....ah hope a little ol slug climbs all over you, ah surely do.
Sheepdip.
