My body inspires poetry

After my recent 3-week cleanse, where I lost 4 pounds without really trying,  I dared, at last, to have a peek at my body in the bathroom mirror.
Even though I covered part of me with one hand and covered 82% of my eyes with the other, I still saw a flash of flesh. 
Completely unbidden, the following words came to me.

(sung to the tune of "My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean")
~~~
My belly is out of proportion,
My boobies hang down to my knees
My buttocks show signs of distortion,
I want my teen body back PLEASE.

Bring back, bring back,
O bring back my body to me, to MEEEEE
Bring back, bring back,
O bring back my body to ME!

My muffin top makes a tsunami,
whenever I shimmy or cough
I can't stand the visual whammy,
So next time I'll leave the lights OFF.

Bring back, bring back,
O bring back my body to me, to MEEEEE
Bring back, bring back,
O bring back my body to ME!
~~~

And how was YOUR day?

Tragedy Strikes Local Village. Many Stricken.

'Twas a peaceful day in the village.....................

Suddenly, a plague descended upon the townspeople.

Witnesses see a mysterious CREATURE slinking through the village, striking innocent victims at random.

At last the CREATURE is revealed. It's Milo-zilla!!!!

There goes the Church!

Kathryn (and Milo) : )